My Blackbird Heart

mother.

i have been looking for you 

in photographs from my childhood. 

i see pictures of me

alone

aloof 

almost secure. 

look closer 

i am contained,

living inside the aviary you built 

for my blackbird heart

soaring only as high as you deemed 

seeing the world from the bottom of a well

doomed to walk behind you 

on my way back to the 

living, breathing light.

your gaze and your doubt 

caused my heart to vanish 

leaving only you,
  
my unfettered rage.